Polite Fiction. I got this email a while back promising a
nice sum of money if I just helped this Nigerian government official
move his inheritance to an American bank and to make a long story
short, it hasn't worked out so well for me money-wise. So my neighbor
Brett said I told you so, I told you if you believe this guy
you'll be wasting your money. And I said back no way, dude! I did
not waste that money! To say the money was wasted is an insult to
the money, which had nothing to do with the decision that resulted
in its loss! I demand you apologize for denigrating innocent money
I said, emphatically.
Fortunately, Brett did the right thing. You're right,
man, he said, the money wasn't wasted. It was sacrificed. That's
completely different! I'm, like, totally sorry I said wasted just
because it was such a grievous price to pay for such a stupid mistake.
And I said OK then, I accept your apology on behalf of the lost money.
Just remember! Money only follows orders. Money does not make policy.
Therefore, money is never wasted. QED, dude.
And now if you'll excuse me, I have to go send Mr. Abacha one more check.